Consistency Rule: Once you have taken a position or endorsed an idea, product, person, etc. with your words (even internally) you should be more willing to act on the behaviors consistent with that endorsement or “position”.  

Big question: what comes first, the belief or the behavior? 

The rule of consistency can be a very strong motivator of human behavior. Consistency means that we want alignment and coherence between our thoughts, feelings, and actions. When we are misaligned we experience something called dissonance and have a tendency to engage in mental gymnastics or behavioral change in an effort to regain our consistency.  

For example, have you ever recommended a restaurant to a friend and then found yourself at that same place later that week or even the very same day? Have you volunteered for an organization just to help a friend or family member, then found yourself touting the mission? Have you ever praised a co-worker or direct report to your supervisor and then found it hard to hold them accountable for outcomes? These are all examples of the rule of consistency. (This is also why it usually backfires when parents “ban” their children from a particular person or social group–the kid spends so much time extolling the reasons why they like that person or group that their behavior becomes locked into that belief and it becomes really hard to find your way out!)

The consistency rule is used in sales and marketing all the time because sales and marketing experts know that, as entrepreneur.com puts it, one yes leads to another! To illustrate, let’s examine two common sales and marketing tactics: the Foot-in-the-Door Technique and the Low-Ball technique

Foot-in-the-Door Technique: Get people to say yes to an easy, painless request because it increases the chances they will agree to the bigger ask. Why? Because our mind seeks consistency with prior behaviors. 

The fable of the Bedouin and the Camel is a great example of this technique, albeit it starts with a nose, and not a foot! In this fable, on a cold desert night a Bedouin was sleeping in his tent with the camel tied outside. As the night gets colder the camel peeks its nose under the tent and the man allows it…before long the camel has inched its whole head into the tent, followed by its neck and eventually the Bedouin wakes up with the camel sleeping fully inside the tent!

You will find the Foot-in-the-Door Technique everywhere! My social media expert Jane Lockhart even helps me put this technique to work to increase my influence. For example we start with (hopefully) great content that helps you navigate your world of work→then we ask you to reciprocate with a small ‘yes’ by liking my post or commenting on social media→eventually when the timing is right we hope that you engage more deeply by subscribing the the newsletter or sharing valuable content with others→finally asking to learn more about your world through an introductory meeting.   

Low-ball technique: Get people to commit to a low offer, and raise the ask after they say yes.

In the low-ball technique, the persuader seeks to get you to commit to a lower price and then after you say yes to the commitment they raise the price or add to your commitment with another bigger offer. Think about added costs that have been tacked onto a purchase after you have already decided that to purchase that item…from small annoyances like an appliance that doesn’t come with a power cord to large fees added onto a car purchase–the low-ball technique takes advantage of our brain’s laziness and desire to move on to the next thing once a decision has been made. 

In our organizations the foot in the door and low-ball technique might show up more than we like to admit, though with time and energy instead of financial commitment. In one example an overworked Redditor asked: “AITA for ignoring my co-worker after she used me to her advantage and expects me to get her a new position?”  

As the OP found out, once she started saying yes to Debbie by helping her get a new position, her time and energy commitment grew day by day until she felt like her only escape was to leave the company. I find this story to be a tragedy for the company involved, not only did they lose a top performer, they are also left with a team that is adrift without a leader all because someone wanted to help and didn’t know how to get out of the cascading series of yesses! 

This story also makes me wonder where their leaders were? Did anyone notice OP was getting burned out? What red flags did their leaders miss that–if seen and addressed– could have led to a different result? What systems would have helped OP save face while still doing the best thing for the company and co-workers? 

The rule of consistency is a strong motivator of human behavior and shows up in our decision making and group behavior every day–yet we often overlook its subtle influence. Our brains seek alignment and coherence between our thoughts, feelings, and actions. When we are misaligned, the cognitive dissonance creates discomfort that we seek to resolve; but, seeking resolution takes cognitive energy and can make people grouchy along the way. 

One thing you can do as a leader is to find ways to actively make sure your organization is not creating unnecessary inconsistencies in policies and processes. Intentional action to address misalignment when it is found goes a long way to letting your people know that you care about the culture and their experiences at work. This work is valuable, and you can get expert assistance in putting together your plan with our help at Syncovate.

For a deep dive on Consistency check out Influence by Robert Cialdini.